So, we finally have an appointment at the Consulate/Embassy in Mexico for Vespera to obtain an immigrant visa. Most people raise their eyebrows at that. No, she is not automatically allowed in the U.S. because we adopted her...just because she is our daughter, part of family, and deeply loved here. Although she's been in the States since she was 2 years old, she has no legal documentation for crossing the border. So, two years after her adoption we were allowed to apply for her immigrant visa, and, now, almost another year later, she has been granted an interview at the Embassy in Mexico. Yes, we have to go to Mexico. And, no, the "powers that be" do not have to allow her back in to the States. Although we're confident that her visa will not be denied, it can technically still be denied. So, in fact, the United States government can tell us that our daughter cannot live with us in the United States.
What I have said to Vespera over and over again since her adoption is that we will not leave her anywhere. She has been abandoned enough times in her life to be afraid that we might. I think it's probably only in the last year that she's really begun to know in her heart that we would never leave her. We will not walk away. And we will fight for her, for her life, for her future, for ability to live in the States and be free.
So, although, we're not making a "plan B" in case the visa is denied, one thing is certain. We won't leave her. This is ultimately what I suppose it means to "be Jesus" to our children. "...the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." (Deuteronomy 3:16) We go with her, and we will not forsake her.
I keep a whiteboard on the fridge keeping everyone posted on the happenings for the week. I was writing out the new week yesterday while Vespera & Novio sat in the kitchen sharing a banana. Novio started counting the days until we leave. I saw that look of anxiety cross his face, and I directed him to a scripture I posted over the sink just yesterday afternoon.
Ok, hang on...I need to post a side note. I am not typically the type of person who posts Bible verses. I have always thought of it as sort of kitchy and often insincere. I am teaching my childbirth class, though, about how the repetition of affirmations can help move beliefs from our brain to our bodies, and I'm coming to realize that there are some truths that I desperately need to move from my brain box out into my body and the rest of my life. I need to physically feel the truth in order to dispose of the fear and anxiety. So, as corny as I feel about it, I'm tacking Bible verses on my wall. I need to go back to the elementary school of faith and memorize the facts. God even commanded the people of Israel to do this with the things they really needed to remember...
"These commandments that I give you today
are to be upon your hearts.
Impress them on your children.
Talk about them when you sit at home
and when you walk along the road,
when you lie down and when you get up.
Tie them as symbols on your hands
and bind them on your foreheads.
Write them on the doorframes of your houses
and on your gates." (Deuteronomy 6:6-9)
Ok, so Novio walked over to the sink and began reading...
But now, this is what the LORD says—
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name;
you are mine.
When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
For I am the LORD, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior...(Isaiah 43:1-3)
When he finished, I said, "See, God is going to Mexico with us. It will be ok."
He replied, "Yes, but is God coming back?"
We all had a good laugh.
Yes, I hope so.
We are thankful for laughter. And for the deep love that surrounds us as we make our travel plans. And for those of you reading our story, sending your love and your prayers with us as we move through this time. Thank you.